Some of you may have left your tea bag in the cup for too long, and found a stewy layer on the surface. Others may have used plastic to wrap up sandwiches for your children Jacob and Lucinda. Both are examples of films. Both have nothing to do with this section, which deals with films of the watching variety. It will contain reviews of films I have seen, links to other people's reviews, and eventually the chance to submit your own film reviews.

150 minutes, Directed by Larry Wachowski & Andy Wachowski

Keanu Reeves: Thomas Anderson

Laurence Fishbourne: Morpheus

Recommended munch: Salted popcorn, no chocolate unless it's ice cream (which you shouldn't eat with a spoon, because there is no spoon)

Although it sounds like it at first, this isn't a futuristic version of The Truman Show, and raises the question of whether ignorance is bliss... The Matrix is a well written, rather complex film which is better enjoyed the less you know about it when you go in. I won't give away too much of the plot, but it basically revolves around reality being a façade created by computers, with humanity being unaware that it is a prisoner. The action is fantastic, and the plot makes this one of the best films I have seen in a very long time. The agents are perfect deadpan men in suit types, and there is the obligatory sexy woman in PVC with guns. The action scenes are excellently filmed, with cameras panning all over the place to catch the kung-fu action. The only problem I had with this film was that there wasn't enough of this action at the end (anyone who has seen the film will know what I mean), you just want a bit more of Keanu Reeves being violent and kicking some artificially intelligent arse. Don't be put off by the confusing first half hour or so, it all falls in place eventually. Make sure you pay attention, or you will lose the plot! Watch this film.

Directed by Michael Patrick Jann

Recommended munch=Milky Way Stars

Even though the title could put you off - this is actually a very good comedy about a beauty pageant. Set out like a documentary, it tracks the progress of the various contestants in the few weeks running up to the contest, the first prize for which is a scholarship and the opportunity to take part in more major pageants, with the chance to become very famous and rich. It's more a dark comedy, with the occasional character unexpectedly dying (hence the name), and the whole plot is actually very well thought out. It's entertaining for most parts, largely due to some of the bad taste jokes (the breathless yet constantly grinning anorexic pageant champion, who lip-synchs in her wheelchair is one example). Matt Malloy is brilliant as the aptly named John Dough, one of the judges and a bit of a dirty pervert, who wouldn’t be suspected of being such if he wasn't trying to justify his actions all the time to the camera crews. Also very funny is Will Sasso as the fat retarded son of Michael McShane. Surprisingly good!

Have you seen a film that you want to rant on about? Well, here's your chance! It can be about any film, whether it's been reviewed here or not, so get on with it and let's have some intelligent criticism...